Tips and ideas for living an authentic life


This might be one of the biggest challenges on the planet.

The thing is, effectively saying who you are can be incredibly useful (understatement), but it really isn’t an issue of accuracy, it’s really about creativity. You won’t understand who you are by figuring out an accurate way to say it – you understand it by being it.

Being who you are, since you are creative by nature, means creating experiences that you naturally want to create – things like doing stuff with people you care about, rewarding work, personal adventures and so forth. Saying who you are is actually part of that creative process, not a fact – and saying it creatively is usually extraordinarily rewarding.

People often approach identity from the standpoint of a fixed concept. I am a good person, I am a smart person, I am a loser, I am an entrepreneur. That’s not a very useful starting place for a being that is anything but a concept and doesn’t like being limited by a definition of who they are.

Consider that who you are is energy – resonant energy. So, you are whatever resonates with you meaning – it feels right. So, you are energy, not a fact. The person you might be talking with is also resonant energy – stuff that feels right for them. Resonant energy has creative properties, so when you resonate with someone else and they with you, creativity is ready to happen. Could be a business project, a golf game or a date – who knows?

As a creative energetic being, you often look for relationship with others so that you can create new adventures. When you first meet, you might start with some form of saying, who you are. That who you are statement is most creative when it seeks to discover energetic relevance rather than factually stating who you are.

If you don’t say who you are in a way that is energetically relevant to the person or people listening then they won’t resonate with you and nothing will happen. Relationships aren’t built on a concept of who you are, they are built through resonant energy. So, saying who you are is not a statement of something factual – it is a creative first step in connecting with others, i.e. discovering what resonates with them.

I work mostly with entrepreneurs in this area because businesses that don’t creatively say who they are, don’t make themselves relevant and so they also don’t sell much. When you talk about business positioning and brand identity, you are talking about creating a who I am statement designed to discover energetic relevance.

This is in my opinion, the greatest obstacle to business success (and success in relationships). Don’t try to reduce who you are to a concept.

Be who you are by saying who you are in a creative way designed to discover energetic relevance with others. Make what resonates with you relevant in the world and you unleash creative possibilities. Say who you are creatively – that is how to be yourself!

It’s way more fun to be relevant than to be right (and it will make you all the money and get you all the quality relationships you will ever want).

Comments on: "SAY WHO YOU ARE" (4)

  1. Ted,
    I really get this message and it certainly applies to me. So, how about some examples? Like, “I’m Paula, educator of healing through movement and touch.” Or, “I’m Paula, and I really LOVE feeling good so I help others feel good too.” Is this something like what you are suggesting, with added exuberance than words alone express.

    • Connection with another happens in the moment so you will want to test those and other ideas to see people’s instant response. Are they drawn in energetically (notice body language) and do they immediately ask a relevant question? You could try something like, “I work with kids who have learning troubles.” If they have a kid or a job where this is an energetic issue, they will probably let you know. A key: say the sentence and then stop talking! Wait to see if they connect with that energy. If they do, creativity will naturally happen. Good luck!

  2. Ted, the way I interpret your message is a focus on being authentic in your business relationships. To me authentic is a dynamic (energetic) process that changes as we change and grow. And at the same time the core of who we are remains the same.

    You examples: I am a good person is a common way we speak about themselves. I like helping people to discover their passion associated with the label. Is it a way of “being” in the world? What are the behaviors associated with “good.” Hence, it is about the creative energy one can bring to “being” which is the creative process.

    I like helping people change their relationship with pain and suffering so they can experience a more fulfilling and meaning life. I find this resonates with most people I talk with about who I am and what I do as a therapist and coach.

    Warmly, Brenda

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